You know that moment where everything is messy before it is clean? I'm in that moment right now and paralyzed to get myself out of it. I have actually been procrastinating for the last month and I think it is my subconscious brain, refusing to move yet again. I really really want to move to Honduras, but my mental health can't take another transition so soon. I want to get the hell out of Los Angeles, but I really need an actual kick in the ass to get myself in gear. Where's my mom when I need her?
"You buy furniture. You tell yourself, this is the last sofa I will ever need in my life. Buy the sofa, then for a couple of years you're satisfied that no matter what goes wrong, at least you've got your sofa issue handled. Then the right set of dishes. Then the perfect bed. The drapes. The rug. Then you're trapped in your lovely nest, and the things you used to own, now they own you."
---From Chuck Palahniuk's Fight Club
This seems particularly relevant as I pack to move out of the country again. I told myself when I first moved from Ohio that I would never be so tied to a place again with material objects and now I have an apartment full of furniture to try to get rid of....things really do start to own you if you're not careful. I need to remind myself that the only truly essential things are not what you buy, but what you cultivate within yourself.
